Alone on a Stool

Macabre Whiskey Dreams

Here the nights bring them all out:
The kings and queens,
The fools and fiends,
And they all stumble through the streets
Conscious only of every other step.
There’s a rumble there in the darkness,
The roar and exultations
Shoot through the alleys,
Illuminating the dark with violence.
Along the walls of this bar,
Like fallen angels, solitary,
Lingering and despondent in purgatory,
All the sad girls fix their hair,
Raise their dresses and scan the room
Looking for someone, anyone to see their light.
With bared teeth, they smile at no one,
Everyone and take the drinks that come,
Laughing and sighing at empty witticisms,
And hope to catch that one
Pair of eyes to fill the desolation.
I can do nothing but sit on the stool.
My back turned to the glow,
The city pulses and breathes through
The dusty window of the pub.
I could be anywhere in the world right now,
I think to myself, sipping my whiskey,
The two cubes melted and spinning
Together falling into an invisible gyre.
I see my reflection in the taps,
Stretched out and warped,
The conversationalists standing behind me,
Look further away than seems reasonable,
And appear to talk through me
As my distorted visage divides them.
I pause my meditative silence, briefly,
Rarely, nodding in agreement to another,
While I espy the wild gesticulations,
The voluminous retorts and rebuttals
Of the inebriated circle around the bar.
When I’ve had my fill I rise to leave,
Catch the eyes of a young woman
And convince myself to ignore her.
Walking home, the tips of my shoes
Flash into my vision as I stumbled along
Past barred storefronts, the embracing and the sick.
I hear voices in the distance and approaching,
I hear the laughter slowly fade out as it passes,
And ringing in my head, returning effervescently,
I hear the soft mutterings of a young girl’s tears.
Shambling down the bank, slowly, assuredly,
I feel the water brush the soles of my feet
And I collapse against the riverside,
Haunted again by those low whimpers
And I wonder where she sleeps tonight,
Where she rests her head and what she dreams.